This English Major had a relatively tiring day. Had to get to school early to practice for the upcoming group activity (live performance meeting) for my Parliamentary class on Wednesday, which half of the members by the way missed (those who wanted to practice weren’t there, so if they flunk they can’t blame those of us who sacrificed).
Then I had to attend three major subjects ’til 6 pm. Afterwards I had a ball game in which I played about four (?) minutes, and then had a Double Cheese Burger and Monster Rockin’ Ruby Float at McDonald’s. Maui and I got home at about 10:30. I’m quite drained, but I can’t complain. This day was productive, thus great. Thank you God.
Good night Blog Sphere and faithful (?) readers. And to the all the Sakata Gintoki fans and Batang 90′s like me. Que vivirá para siempre Batang 90′s! Espero que haya dulces sueños, hermoso pueblo.
God made me eat my words when I said I’m officially not for mainstream. Turns out that I can make it there, and God used some unfavorable circumstances to making His point to me even more of a bang. I am speechless and pumped with adrenaline right now; I’m not coherent enough to relate what happened. Maybe one day I’ll get to tell you that story.
Thank you God! Thank you White and Blue! Thank you friends!
I was searching the Web for news articles to brush up on my straight news writing, when I came across a site that had a bunch of funny news articles. I thought I’d share a few of the laughs with you. Have a great Saturday!
Elderly Man Sued for Stopping at Stop Sign September 9, 2002 – Atlanta, USA
In a case possibly first of its kind, 67 year old Arthur Thompson is being sued by 32 year old Lynn Manaouski for stopping at a 4-way stop sign. In her statement she described how she came up to the intersection leading into her downtown condo, and rear ended the driver in front of her due to his ‘complete and full stop’. She continues to say that of the almost 2 years of living in that particular condominium complex, she had not once been behind someone who had made a full stop at the stop sign, and that his inability to be ‘consistent with typical driving patterns’ caused the accident. As a result, she is convinced that Mr. Thompson is directly responsible for the accident and should be held accountable for all incurred costs of repair to both vehicles. When reminded that it is the law to make a complete stop at a stop sign, her abrupt response was “I am quite capable of deciding when it is a good or bad time to stop my vehicle.”
Worlds Cheapest Tip September 1, 2002 – Arkansas, USA
An Arkansas primary school teacher has been declared the worlds cheapest tipper after ordering more than $250 worth of food and drinks for his wife and self and leaving a 5 rupee tip. Rupee, an Indian currency, is worth approximately 0.02 of an American dollar. When questioned the man replied, “I had just returned from a trip to India and I had mistaken the coins for more valuable American currency.” Relaying this to the offended waitress she responded, “His excuse is weak, since when would you be cracking out foreign coins (that do not even resemble American money) as a tip for a $250 dollar dinner? There is no way with a bill like that you would use coins to tip at the customary 10%-15%, and even tipping at something like 3% would still need bills. His tip wasn’t even a percent!”
Lack of Talent Contest Being Held for Next Batch of Mac Commercials July 22, 2002 – New York, USA
Apple’s new “Switch” television ad campaign, featuring people who didn’t quite know what to do with a Windows based PC that moved to that Mac platform, will continue into the summer season. In order to find actors similarly dense and ignorant to the ones featured in the first batch of commercials, Apple will be holding a Lack of Talent contest. Campaign producer Ted Zielchman commented, “All of the actors we were getting from the talent agencies were too intelligent, and these are people who are usually rejected based on lack of intelligence, so we are faced with a unique problem. I believe though, based on the applicants for the contest so far, we have some likely candidates. Some were unable to even spell their name and had that ‘not so bright look on their face’ – consistent with the first batch of actors we used. The first batch were easy to find, we visited the local district Mac Club. After that we simply had a hard time finding anyone willing to admit being an Apple user.”
Publisher Releases Guide to Kicking Cats July 25, 2002 – USA
The 45 page colour instructional book entitled “Kicking Cats” guides men through the process of kicking cats down flights of stairs without repercussions from their spouse or girlfriends. “It isn’t as easy as one would think to successfully do and get away with”, comments author John Moore. “I was caught numerous times by my at the time girlfriends and eventually became determined to develop a fail-proof process. This book represents years of studying, practicing, research and an estimated 150 test cats. At first I was somewhat alarmed by my dislike for cats, when considering how much my girlfriends and ex-wife liked them. But after talking to scores of other men about my pent up feelings of anger towards cats, I realized I was far from alone. That is why the introduction goes into great detail about the history of cat kicking and some of the current theories on men’s hatred of cats. The secret to a successful kick is to first befriend the cat, building its trust in you. It is when the cat is truly relaxed and comfortable around you that you can then angle it towards the stair case for a mighty punt.”
Man Never Misses Trip To Gym For 5 Years July 29, 2002 – Florida, USA
In an attempt to force himself into a healthy routine of exercise, a Florida man hired a hit man to kill him if he failed to show up to any of his 3 weekly workouts for the past 5 years. “At first I thought the ridiculous membership fees and that ludicrous up front joining fee would make me workout so I wouldn’t waste the money – but that didn’t work. Within weeks I was coming up with all sorts of lame pathetic excuses not to go. So I decided that if money wouldn’t promote me to go, losing my life would. The hit man idea has worked like a charm, maybe even too good. There were some times that I truly would have preferred not to go, like that time I had bronchial asthmatic pneumonia. I’ve never had so much dark green mucus running down my face in my life, you should have seen that treadmill afterwards. But with all its ups and downs, my only complaint lately is that what I originally thought were expensive gym fees have been over shadowed by the high cost of the hit man. Now that I want to stop, I can’t because I told him to shoot me if I told him I wanted to give up.”
Congratulations to Spain for winning the World Cup (for the first time in history) by defeating the Netherlands (who did a pretty darn good job throughout the tournament) 1:0. I’m, not too happy about it (oh Germany!), but I’m a good sport. :)
Good job Spain, and most particularly Iniesta. Splendid play, converting Fabregas’ pass and putting Spain on top of the world. For now. Good for you, Andres.
The top of the world goal.
Of course, congratulations to my team, Germany for placing 3rd, defeating Uruguay 3:2 (definitely a more exciting game than the final game itself). I hope next year you can get your 4th Cup.
A significant number of individuals (I included) often make the mistake of using the abbreviation i.e. instead of e.g. when giving examples. We should know that i.e. and e.g. are two Latin abbreviations with different meanings and uses.
i.e. stands for ‘id est’, which means ‘that is’. Proper usage of this would be when you are trying to expound on something, not when you are giving an example. It’s equivalent is most likely ‘in other words…’.
That dog is aesthetically challenged (i.e. ugly ).
e.g. on the other hand, stands for Latin ‘exempli gratia’ which basically means ‘for the sake of example’ or ‘an example would be’. Obviously, this is what must be used when giving examples.
I’d like to visit a European country (e.g. England, Spain, France).
In theory, I think aliens exist, or at the very least, existed (haha). Proof of this would be a segment of today’s mainstream teen fashion. If you haven’t noticed, jackets look like shiny space suits and shoes look like space boots. Jeans have these weird prints on them, and the sunglasses have shutters across the lenses, which in my opinion have no functional purpose. Alien clothes have seemingly found their way into teenagers’ closets, and are derisory to those who wear them. But on the contrary, some people may actually find them cool. No harm meant if that’s the case.
We all need comic relief once in awhile, don’t you think? Especially during the very stressful Philippine election period. Seriously, it’s as stressful for the voters as it’s stressful for the candidates! So friends, I hope you have as good a laugh as I did. Enjoy! Oh, and don’t get too pissed when you hear the singing.
I’d like to thank my cousin, Ria for this marvelous theme. She made it just the way I wanted it. The best part is I just told her a few details of how I’d like it and, voila! So Thanks cous! IOU.
As a pastor was visiting an elderly lady in the hospital he noticed a bowl of peanuts by her bed. He began to nibble the peanuts as they visited and by the end of the visit realized he had consumed the entire bowl. Feeling badly he bought a bag and brought them to her the next day. As he gave them to her he explained they were to replace those he’d eaten the day before. “Why you didn’t need to do that Pastor”, the lady explained. “The thing is, I don’t have any teeth, so when my nephew brings me chocolate-covered peanuts. Well, I just suck the chocolate off and spit the peanuts in the bowl.”
Laughter is the best medicine. Let’s all have a healthy Sunday filled with laughs. (colon capital D)
L (Mr. Lontoc - Mr. L - L) says thanks for taking the time to drop by H☺☻lΩh☻☺ps™, and welcomes you to his sphere. Hopefully, you enjoy spinning around the loop and learn something worthwhile at the same time.
Since he was a kid with snot all over his face, L has enjoyed story telling and writing. He'd use to come up with fantastic stories on the spot that usually had his adult listeners roaring with laughter.
Because his loving parents recognized his passion for the art, they surrounded him with books and sent him to the University of the Philippines' Summer Arts Workshops where he studied creative writing under the supervision of Cristina Bejar. The workshop nurtured his love for writing, and sharpened his skill as a pen man.
L is a harmless guy who only hurts the mosquitoes that buzz around his head at night and other irritating pests, and he welcomes your feedback and comments. He is also willing to listen to your suggestions etc. However, L does not tolerate spammers. His spam detector makes sure of that. Oh, he also detests plagiarism.
So again, thanks for visiting, welcome, and enjoy! Cheers!
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